Christmas Eve Eve.
After the dithering of last night we decided to make a plan before setting off for an evening meal so after some discussion we decided to head up the road to a restaurant we’d spotted that offered a selection of BBQ food including lots of fish.
The girls were ready to go before me so we agreed i would meet them there in a few minutes.
I finished my ablutions, locked up and set off at a leisurely pace up the road.
When i arrived i found the Restaurant completely empty.
The girls had clearly not arrived.
Having handed over all the money to Jaki after last nights incompetence where i mistook a 1000 BHT note for a 100, i found myself without funds so buying a beer and waiting for them to turn up wasn’t an option.
Waiting in the street wasn’t an option either as this particular part of the road is where the Girlie bars are concentrated and i cut a rather pathetic figure loitering around with a vacant grin and empty pockets.
I back tracked and decided to run the gauntlet of every hustler between here and the Hotel by looking for them in each shop.
I found them as expected looking at Jewellery, completely unaware that i had been marooned for the last 20 minutes without a chaperone or any means of looking after my self. However, they hadn’t slated the shopping thirst so i was dispatched with a 500 BHT note and told to go and get a beer some where, which i did.
They eventually found me in a pop up Cocktail bar and we indulged in a few rather well made Margherita cocktails served in plastic glasses with salt around the rim before continuing our quest for food.
Given that our first choice restaurant had no one in it we changed tack and decided to eat local. Jaki pointed out a place further down the road ((Popeyes) which seemed to be busy so we set off for there.
Seated and with the menu in front of us we chose our individual dishes from the vast selection on offer.
I went for a Thai chicken curry of some description, Georgia chose a fish dish and Jaki decided it was time for some roughage so chose Stir Fried Kale which, if I’m honest, would have been my last choice.
There was a bit of a wait but this isn’t necessarily a bad thing if the food is being cooked fresh and when it arrived it didn’t all come at once, mine arrived first, then Georgia’s and finally, after an inordinate amount of time, even by Thai standards, did Jaki’s.
Except it wasn’t Jaki’s.
There was no Kale to be seen.
So a quick check of the menu confirmed this as stir fried Basil, which is basically minced meat with fresh Basil and should be hot and spicy.
The waiter was summoned, lots of fingers pointed at the picture of Stir Fried kale on the menu and the sad plate of Mince was handed back.
He grinned a lot, said ‘Solly’ and buggered off, not to be seen again for another 30 minutes when he re-appeared triumphantly clutching a plate of raw Kale stalks interspersed with some soggy gristle (that was identified later as crispy pork) and placed it in front of jaki, daring her to complain.
Her plate of sticky rice which had been delivered a life time ago, now sat cold and congealing, a fitting accompaniment to the pile of Kale stalks.
To give her credit, she did try to eat it. At least, some of the more tender stalks but this would have defeated a Giant Panda. It was for all intents and purposes, un-edible.
We paid up (450 BHT) and left without leaving a tip.
Jaki’s evening went from bad to worse when we decided we’d had enough entertainment for one evening and headed back to the Hotel without stopping for any more drinks.
By the time i came out of the Bathroom she was in bed with the covers pulled over her head, lights out and the first chorus of her night song warbling around the room.
Night night Thailand, you never cease to ‘make I Larf’.