Portsmouth to Santander. 16th March 2014

A new blog for a new trip. So much to tell and only a limited number of Brain Cell’s left to do it with, so this will be a bit random, not least because Jaki has just handed me a key to our room at the Chatrium, Bangkok. Opps!

Were in our Cabin now. Well if you can call 6 foot by 4 foot of vibrating shed a cabin.

We were in the bar drinking a rather nice bottle of wine and decided to go get some food when we realised everything had shut.
2300 hrs on a French a Ferry and everything is closed. The girls would have only just finished ‘pre lash’ by now.

So, starving hungry and half pissed were resigned to waiting till the morning for food. At least the ‘Fat Boys Breakfast Blog’ will take on a new dimension.

The trip to Plymouth was easy. We left home at 1100 hrs and stopped at Tesco garage in Winterbourne to fill up.

Unfortunately the cut off on the nozzle didn’t work so I filled the tank and one of my Croc’s with Diesel. Great for the feet apparently.

Then we needed to top up the tyres which were at 40 PSI instead of the recommended 70. No wonder the walls are cracked.

We managed to get stuck behind Reginald Mole husband who was determined to force air into his tyres whether they needed it or not. He had a strange approach. He appeared to put one burst of air into each tyre before moving on to the next. This meant he circled the car like some demented RedIndian, about 8 times before he was done.

Then the twat lost one of his dust caps and spent 10 minutes looking for it before realising we were waiting and moving off.
We had a bit of a panic at this stage as the van wouldn’t start ( my life flashed before my eyes) and then I realised I hadn’t disengaged the immobiliser. At least I know it work.

Jaki has now started Snoring on the top bunk so I’m expecting the neighbours round soon.

Once we’d pumped up the tyres we set off, stopping at Davan caravans. Weston-Super-Mare to exchange a 7Kilo Gas Cylinder for £22 of my hard earned pounds.
We believe the gas available in Spain is a different system to that used in the UK so we will at some stage have to buy new cylinders and valves and ditch our own bottles as you are only allowed to carry 3.

There are a lot of rules and things to take into account when bringing a camper to Europe .2 reflective triangles, two reflective coats, two breathalysers, a board for the back of the cycle rack, two pairs of glasses, the list goes on. But nowhere did it say pack some sandwiches for the ferry crossing.

It’s our own fault, we went for a drink once we got on board rather than have a sleep and got involved with the resident Magician who performs nightly in the ‘Cabaret Lounge’. To be fair he was good. He did some card tricks with me and Jaki and a couple on the next table, which were pretty impressive. He encouraged us to come along to see his act this evening, which we did but it wasn’t really our ‘thing’.

There was A quiz to start, followed by Bingo, then the ‘Turn’ came on. A singer who wouldn’t have gotten into Tom’s team on the Voice, though Jaki did ‘Turn’ in her swivel chair when he started singing.

When our tame Magician came on he asked us if we were happy, which was a bit ironic as he knew we’d been drinking for 5 hours, he then entered into some audience participation by shouting”Oggy, oggy, oggy”
To which the audience replied. “Oi, Oi, Oi ” and me and Jaki got up and left.

We went to the Piano Bar for a quiet drink ( though quiet isn’t a word I’d currently use as Jaki is now in Top Gear on the Adenoid front) prior to getting some ‘Supper’. I love that word especially when Nigel Slater the TV and Toast chef uses it. Sadly it’s like being on the Isle of Wight. Everything closes at 11.So no supper but an early night.

So Hungry, and a little grumpy I’m gonna put my ear plugs in, pull the Duvet up and dream of Bacon.

It was a long and uncomfortable night.

The bed, is about a foot wide and tight up against the wall. It lends itself to sleeping on your back rather than your front, which Jaki seems to have mastered as she’s going through her full repertoire of notes in the ‘Snoring Scales’. The pillow is the size and feel of a shoe box so my shoulders have been compressed for last 9 hours. But, it was a smooth crossing and I got through it with only minor injuries, mainly incurred trying to get to the en suite through Jaki’s ladder in the dark.

Now were off to breakfast I’m sure my mood will improve.


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